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Confessions of a Not-so-Clueless Exile
Part One – The Long and not very hot summer

Morning all Wanderers fans, Paddy calling from deepest darkest London town. Hope you like the new column, which should be (with luck and a bit of material) a weekly thing.
So, I return from a distinctly damp France and what have I missed getting rained on in Brittany? My first thoughts would be, in the words of Paul Daniels “not a lot”, but actually a fair bit has been going on to make this interminable few weeks without footie pass, not least an actual game. Typically, I missed the Grays affair due to being stuck on a ferry in the channel. Gutted to have missed out, as by all accounts it was on a par with Brazil-Italy 1970. Seriously, I would take a drab nil-nil about now as it feels like forever since our season ended with a loss to that lot down the Crem. I sadly have to wait until Cheltenham on 28 July for my first view of the new recruits (why didn`t I book Ireland for this week rather than France for last ????) but bring it on as August 11th and the real stuff can`t come quick enough.

The view from here on the transfers is a pretty rosy glow. I could do negative, but if you want that read JIWAL in ALOB – that bloke must be the most depressed Wolves fan who ever lived, and there`s plenty of competition (I`m looking at you ClaytonWolf on old MM).
Ward – thank the heavens a defender! A good centre back and will hopefully work really well in tandem with Collins to give us a new solidity at the back and maybe a bit more pace. At least there is a prospect of not having Breen in the starting line-up after his two MOTM performances for the Albion in May.
Jarvis – I`m excited by this signing, although my source in Essex on Saturday reckoned he might be a touch one-footed. Who gives a toss if he has pace to burn and works hard? We now have some excellent choices on the wings, a point which doesn`t appear to have gone un-noticed chez McIndoe (bye Michael – shut the door on the way out and thanks for almost bugger all).
Eastwood – two words. Great. Signing. Not only that but Jez the pantomime villain managed to bully the immensely annoying tactics being used by the Southend chairman and got our man for a song. Fred and Keogh up front with Bothroyd on the bench as the impact player please.

I still have concerns about Right Back and Left Back, but we are building a good, young squad here, and the future is looking reasonably bright. Of course, knowing Wolves, the light at the end of the tunnel is probably an onrushing express.

In other news, early progress is being made in setting up the BCD hot curry eating competition (pictures of which will no doubt appear in later columns). Well sort of progress – we have found an Albion muppet stupid enough to take on our resident Dingle Phal-fiend, and the rules are now subject to a long phase of argument regarding the scoring. As an arbitrator of this feat of sporting endurance that must dwarf the Tour De France, I assure you, dear readers, that I will of course be completely impartial. Not.

So another two weeks until my next game and only four until the season proper, and we actually appear to be in a good position. Think back 12 months – about the only good news was that the Square-chinned imbecile had gone as Super Mick hadn`t arrived to tick all the boxes and we were struggling to get 11 on the pitch. We have come a long way – hopefully in 12 months we will be celebrating having gone even further.

In the meantime – see you in the Western and mine`s a Carling.


Paddy

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